I felt sad today when I opened my school newspaper and saw Alex Shortle, the Speaker of the House, modeling in a big advertising spread for DC Tux in the exact same space that Student Body President Lindsey McDaniel had occupied two weeks before. I know it’s good money, but it’s an awkward coincidence that the two most powerful members of the student government just happen to be the same people pasting tuxedo rental advertisements to the wall (by the way, it’s illegal to post advertisements for an independent company on school property). I feel like my student government is selling its soul. Any day now, it might change from the Student Senate to the patiofurniture.com Senate.
I’m in Mr. Gossard’s SRT. He’s the #1 government teacher in the school (I believe he has 6 classes), so the 5-6 kids making up government tests second semester are a regular fixture of the room, just like all the election posters and the life-size cardboard sign with the funny-looking guy from some TV show saying “I LOVE YOU MAN!”, a joke I still don’t understand. Also, Mr. Gossard mysteriously disappears for at least 45 minutes every period. There’s always people looking for him. The kids are really honest, though; only one of them has ever cheated since I’ve been in that SRT. That one, ironically, was the Speaker of the House of Representatives, who pumped her friend for answers and definitions from the book while Mr. Gossard was out. It seemed like she simply didn’t know much about US government, which is ironic because she went on to win the Daughters of the American Revolution’s award for Outstanding Citizenship in the community.
I suppose it’s rather fitting of student government, which, while excellent at times, becomes a tiring gauntlet of popularity contests between completely indistinguishable candidates during the election season. I wish they didn’t abuse our cafeteria with irritating signs every year, but I suppose it’s an indispensable part of the election process. Last year, I posted a sign on my locker saying I would rent the space out for campaign advertisements to the highest bidder. No one wrote back. That’s too bad, but I suppose it doesn’t really make a difference. I do look forward to Jessica winning another unopposed election for Vice President if she still wants the job, and student government does do more good than bad. Nevertheless, sometimes it just worries me.